9 Must Haves for the NFP User's Postpartum Care Kit!

If you or someone you know is preparing for the birth of a baby, you may have heard something or other about postpartum care. Childbirth is laborious for both woman and child, and the time after the fact is crucial for mother/baby bonding. Not only is this time important for mental health, but a mother also heals physically from the birth: her uterus will expel lochia tissue and blood for 6-8 weeks, and her body will shift back slowly to its pre-pregnancy state. Rest, recovery, and more rest are all crucial for the mother to stay healthy.

It is no wonder then that the mother will want a “kit” of sorts to help her focus on self-care! Not only will she look after a newborn, but for herself as well: it can feel very overwhelming. You can find many ideas online for a postpartum kit, sharing all kinds of options for pads, herbal baths, spritz baths, support for breastfeeding, binders to help her organs shift back into place, etc. Just like the need for a plan for birth preferences, a woman will need to plan and prepare for her postpartum period.

For the woman who uses NFP, postpartum is more than just a time to heal from birth. It is also a time to start charting again! As your main method of preventing pregnancy - and also a handy tool to monitor your reproductive health after childbirth - you will need as much help as you can get in order to prepare for charting. In this post, I plan to share my own tips for a postpartum NFP kit, both as an instructor and mother of two.

1) Pregnancy tests.

No, really, buy in bulk! Especially if you are breastfeeding, charting with NFP after birth can be an anxious time; it doesn't matter how confident you feel about your method's effectiveness. You are carefully awaiting your body to ovulate, whether it happens in the next few weeks, months, or years! While charting will let you know if pregnancy was even possible, having a box of cheap tests to show you a “negative” will do your frantic mind a favor. Even formula feeding mothers who are expected to cycle 4-12 weeks after birth could benefit from a negative test. You can buy cheap brands online through Amazon (such as Wondfo), and you can also find cheap store brands at places like Walmart or the Dollar Store.

2) LH and Progesterone tests.

Testing for ovulation-related hormones are very objective and give a clear indication of where your hormones are at. They can confirm if your body is trying to ovulate (LH), and whether you HAVE ovulated (progesterone). In fact, some women use the Marquette Method of NFP to test their hormones, using the Clear Blue Easy fertility monitor (which tests for estrogen and LH, with their own special line of test sticks). Others may also use these tests as supplements to their other fertile signs, rather than using them as a separate method. To decide which is right for you, speak with a Marquette instructor and women who use the method. You can buy LH strips for cheap in bulk from Amazon, and also find MFB Fertility's progesterone test strips there as well.

3) Update phone numbers and email addresses of your instructor, and be sure to schedule a follow-up with them before and after the birth.

And if you do not have one, now is the time to shop around for one! You may be rusty with charting after going 9 months without it, and you will definitely need to go over special rules for charting postpartum to ensure your method effectiveness. While this holds true for those who never charted postpartum before, even seasoned NFP users will want to at least refresh with an instructor or with their book. Think of it this way: an instructor is cheaper than another 9 months of prenatal medical care! I myself not only offer classes online, but I do consultations as well.

4) Restock on charts and needed materials.

If you use paper charts, either buy more or print more yourself. There are numerous charts you can download for free online, but be sure to use the one that best fits your method. If you use a charting app or online chart, make sure you recall the needed password to log in, and how to use their features. And remember: if you ever want to switch from online charting to paper charting during your postpartum time, or vice versa, make sure you transfer all the data you have charted thus far so as to avoid confusion!

5) Use cute and practical tools to make NFP easier to handle.

Find a cute alarm clock for taking your temperature. Buy that silly pen for your paper chart. Store your charts in a pretty binder or folder and store it somewhere safe. If you use a charting app, find an app that lets you customize it to your needs and is appealing to you. Some women also like to compare their cycles or moods to the lunar cycle, so getting a weather app or moon calendar could make tracking fertility more lighthearted.

Also be sure that your spouse is involved. If you use paper charts, keep the chart posted where they can find and look at it. Or, you could set up a system to let him know whether you are fertile: leave a special symbol on the family calendar, as an example. Be creative, and talk about it with your spouse to figure out what makes it easier to share information.

6) Collect resources to keep your relationship strong during this transition.

Before the baby is born, sit down with your spouse and discuss how to bond together during this rough time. Babies can be rough on marriages, but only if you let them! See if family can help watch the baby for an hour so the two of you can relax and bond, or even enjoy a rare moment for lovemaking. Start-up a subscription to Amazon Prime or Netflix if you haven't, or stock up on DVDs of your favorite movies and shows; there will be nights where baby keeps you up, so make it fun for yourselves at least and share movie nights. Perhaps you could ask for restaurant and take out gift cards for those nights where you want to try something new and fun. And don't be afraid to reach out to counseling if things get too much; find out what low-cost options are in your community through churches or other organizations. Whatever you do to share time together, be intentional about it and ask for help when needed!

7) Join a postpartum forum!

It’s important to be able to find a safe space to discuss postpartum needs where other members can help or understand. A neat NFP-focused group for Postpartum support can be found here. Also feel free to explore non-NFP postpartum and mothering groups that fit your lifestyle! Simply be sure that the group is positive, supportive, and a place where frustrations can be shared without judgement. You have enough drama with healing after birth, raising a new baby, and also maintaining your relationship; the last thing you want are mommy wars.

8) If you are breastfeeding, keep a copy of Sheila Kippley’s book The Seven Standards of Ecological Breastfeeding.

While this method of breastfeeding is taught as a child spacer, you don’t have to practice it in order to find use in the book. Kippley shares invaluable information on what is and isn’t normal for breastfeeding infertility to look like, and also what can encourage an earlier return of fertility. By knowing the ins and outs of how nursing affects your menstrual cycles (or lack thereof!) you will have empowering knowledge to better equip your charting.

9) Plan out your "punching bag".

Ask any experienced NFP user or instructor what they feel is the hardest time in life to chart: most will likely say "postpartum charting". The fluctuation of hormones after birth and during breastfeeding can give all kinds of crazy fertile signs, and some women find that they can not trust their bodies as they did before. Other times, they perfectly understand their charts but hate how long they must abstain! To safely relieve stress, plan ahead about how you want to destress. Are they relaxing baths? Reading a favorite book? Perhaps you want to arrange for an on-call babysitter to watch the little ones so you can enjoy a walk alone? Or, better yet, you want an actual punching bag to punch and kick the frustration away! Whatever you do, acknowledge that stress is normal and can be handled in safe ways.

Postpartum charting is challenging, but you do not have to walk into it totally blind.

Prepare for your postpartum time, and hopefully adjustment to post-birth life will go smoother. By handling the "hard stuff" before it even happens, your family and especially yourself will reap the benefits!

Did you find these suggestions helpful? Is there anything you would add? Comment below!

Product Review: MFB Fertility's Ovulation Double Check Sticks

As an instructor and user of Natural Family Planning, I strive not only to find ways to make charting more reliable and easy for my clients, but also for myself. This is even more prudent concerning confusing cycles, particularly those after a mother heals from birth. Any woman can attest that charting her return of fertility and following cycles after birth are the most challenging for most NFP users. Even instructors get a headache!

It was no different this time around in my own experience. After the birth of my second child in December of 2016, I experienced many months of confusion. I was able to use early breastfeeding rules to discern infertility, but after those rules no longer applied I knew it was time to step up my game. I had continuous fertile-quality mucus and could not reliably take my waking temperature for various (baby related) reasons.

This is where this product review comes in. My periods did eventually return, but as I was relying on my cervical mucus alone and was unable to use temperature readings, I needed something to confirm for me whether or not I actually ovulated.

For months I had known about a handy urine test that could do just that: MFB Fertility's very own at-home progesterone test! Called the Ovulation Double Check, this handy test works similar to the more well-known ovulation tests. You urinate in a cup, dip in the test stick, and the stick will show whether the hormone is present. For ovulation tests, they test for the ovulation hormone, LH (which is released whether or not an egg is actually released). Ovulation Double Check, however, tests a different hormone, one that occurs when ovulation is successful: progesterone!

The ovaries produce progesterone when the egg is released. Progesterone prevents further ovulations from occurring, thickens the uterine lining, and holds off period bleeds for about two weeks in the event there is a fertilized egg to support. A presence of progesterone means that ovulation, for sure, happened, and one can assume post-ovulation infertility for the rest of the menstrual cycle.

With this new tool on the market, I knew right away that I had to give it a try in my own uncertainty. My goal was to confirm ovulation while carefully following mucus-only rules for my charting, and boost my confidence for days available for intercourse. How well did this work? Let's find out.

In this review, I will go over directions for use of the test, the design and use of the test stick, and eventually discuss my experience.

The physical test stick:

The test used is very small and skinny, so it is discreet when thrown away or recycled. For me personally this was important, as I currently share a home with three other male family members; I don't want people coming to me with questions about "pregnancy tests" they found in the bathroom garbage can! There is a protective layer of plastic on one side, which is used to lay the test down on a counter without contaminating the tested urine.

Test directions:

The directions were clear and easy to follow. Part of this may have been due to the fact that I have used similar tests for measuring estrogen and LH with the ClearBlue Easy fertility monitor. If you use such tests already, then adding in the Ovulation Double Check into your charting routine will be a breeze. Even if you haven't used tests before, the directions are straightforward to follow; read over them several times before use and you should be good to go!

Use of stick:

Very simple to use. All I had to do was urinate in a cup, dip the test in the urine for five seconds, and then lay the test flat on the bathroom counter. For those new to at-home hormone testing, you may have a hard time urinating in the cup at first. Those who are more squeamish may dislike the idea of possibly touching urine.

The first time I used the Ovulation Double Check test stick, I was on my fifth day past Peak Day (the last day of fertile-quality mucus produced in my cycle, indicating ovulation may have occurred; by the fourth day after the fact, she is considered infertile again. I tested on the fifth day after because the tests did not come until the afternoon before!). I technically received a positive result, but because I wanted a clearer result, I tested again on the sixth day past Peak Day. By then, my test was undeniably positive for progesterone in my system!

As you can imagine, knowing that I had, in fact, ovulated, was a very reassuring answer to have. I plan to use this test until I can rely on temperatures again, after baby is older. However, that does not mean there are no "downsides" to the Ovulation Double Check:

1. You can only use first morning urine to test. If a woman forgets to test her urine after she wakes up, she won't be able to test at all until the next day.
2. 5%-7% of women will not produce enough metabolized progesterone in their urine to show positive test results. If all other signs on your chart show that you have ovulated for sure but your tests come up negative, you can not benefit from Ovulation Double Check.
3. This test can be unreliable if you use progesterone supplements after ovulation. Even supplements used in the previous cycle may potentially give a false positive in the cycle after.

Thankfully, none of the downsides of Ovulation Double Check have affected it's reliability for my own charting. I truly enjoy using it, and I will recommend it to other NFP users who would like the objectivity this test provides. If you feel the test is right for you, you can buy them here on Amazon!

Have you tried MFB Fertility's Ovulation Double Check tests? Did they work for you? Comment below!

Note: This is not an endorsed post; no one paid me to write for this product. This post is not meant to replace medical advice from healthcare professionals.

10 Things NFP Instructors Want You To Know

1) We are just as worried as you about unplanned pregnancies. Yes, pregnancies and children are blessings. Yes, there is nothing wrong with being pregnant, "accident" or not, because it is a normal consequence of intercourse.

BUT, that doesn't mean an unplanned pregnancy - especially if the couple was avoiding for serious reasons - comes without challenges. Our fear, then, is to fail our clients on a method they are supposed to trust. We are good and well trained at we do, and you bet we double and triple check everything before giving an answer or advice! Yet, humans make mistakes, and instructors are not exempt from that.

2) On that note: we mourn with our infertile couples too. Some of us struggle with infertility or pregnancy/child loss and know the pain; others (like me) have not, but still hurt seeing couples carry that burden. We fight for awareness of the struggle, we advocate for wholesome, effective treatments, and for understanding of this condition because of your pain. We see you, we stand by you, and we love you.

3) We hate difficult charts just as much as you do.  It's not that we can't "decipher" them: they're just a pain in the neck. More than likely, we've had a season in our life where charting was more like a chemistry lab final than a simple charting exercise. We know exactly how you feel, know why it stresses you out, and that's why we help...not that it makes it any more fun of course!

4) We hate that you have to abstain too. First off, it's not our jobs to tell you when or when not to have sex: only when you are or are not fertile (if you ask for our input). After that, it's up to you as a couple as to what to do with that information. But we try super hard to make your fertile window as short as possible within reason. Why? Because dealing with longer than usual abstinence can take it's toll. We know, we've been there, and we're doing our best to help with that.

5) We know too much about NFP for our own good. We literally can not shut up about NFP. Okay, we can, but it's our profession and passion! We collect literature and resources on fertility awareness and health, all so we can look at one person's chart and go, "Ah HA! So that's what's going on!"

6) We probably talk about the "gross stuff" (i.e., mucus or sperm) a little too much. Like at the dinner table. Or at a women's group meet up. Or at church. Or to that person you just met on the metro. Nothing much else to add, we just forget in our NFP fervor that sometimes, not everyone sees the topic as "conversation friendly" as we do!

7) Advocating for NFP can be exhausting and downright depressing. Medical professionals blowing you off? People decrying sexism when you point out the risks and side effects of birth control? People constantly spreading misconceptions on the method you were trained to teach and talk about? Yeah. It wears down any professional. Knowing that people get the options and help they need in the end is what keeps us going, even if it is still demoralizing at times.

8) We know NFP isn't perfect. This isn't just related to failure rates (even the best methods can fail for multiple reasons, natural or not): it relates to how NFP can put a big, ugly spotlight on the not-so-nice things about your relationship with your spouse. How NFP can demand the best of us when we feel we shouldn't have to. How charting through a health crisis can make you look at your charts as a damned reminder rather than a helpful tool. How it makes you want to tear up your charts and cry. We instructors know this, and thus desire to help you go through this season in you and your spouse's life!

9) We've "cheated" at charting too. You know, taking chances? Whether we do it for the thrill of "maybe a baby", or out of simple sexual frustration: we've done it too. So, don't feel ashamed if you come to us with charts that show timing of intercourse different from your stated family planning intentions! Chances are, some of us have the babies to prove it.

10) We would do it all over again. Give us a time machine and we would go through the ups and downs of not just using NFP, but of teaching it. Whatever hardships came our way were worth the fruits of our work: empowered, informed couples, helping marriages in rough seasons, and people appreciating their body as it was made.

Are you an NFP instructor? Is there something you would add to take away from the list?

Cervical Mucus: What the heck is it?

In celebration of Cervical Health Awareness Month, what better topic to write about than cervical mucus! Learning to chart this body fluid throughout the menstrual cycle can open the doorway to good health practices, body literacy, and also confidence in family planning.

For those that struggle with charting mucus, I hope these pointers can help clear things up! For those who are new to charting in general, hopefully this can encourage you to give it a try. :)

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When discussing NFP and how it works, I sometimes find myself having to talk a lot on the signs of fertility. And the one most tricky to discuss, in my opinion, is cervical mucus!

Yet, it is also the most important. A woman can start charting her mucus signs at any time, and it is something she will always have throughout her reproductive life. It opens and closes the fertile window of her cycle, and can give an insight to her state of health.

Still, few people seem to understand not just what cervical mucus is, but what it can look like. There are also NFP users who feel unsure in their ability to chart what they see, or they have confusing mucus patterns and find it hard to interpret it.

So it's Biology 101! Lets dive into what cervical mucus is, what it can do, and what it can look like!

What is it?

Cervical mucus (sometimes referred to as cervical fluid) is an important marker and sign of fertility in a woman’s cycle.  Produced by the cervix (located at the end of a woman’s vagina), varying types of mucus are produced depending on how close or far ovulation will occur.

Cervical mucus's role in fertility is to aid sperm transportation and survival in the hopes that it will fertilize an egg. As we will go over later, some traits of mucus can be more conductive to sperm survival than others.

Every woman’s own particular mucus pattern is unique to her, but the coming and going of mucus can give any woman an idea of when she is about to ovulate, and when ovulation has passed, and the egg is dead and gone.  While initially learning to chart, a woman over time usually finds her own pattern; charting this sign becomes easier once she understands it and gets into the habit.

Unfortunately, the way cervical mucus varies in appearance may not always perfectly line up with how it is described in our NFP books and classes. This can lead to confusion if a woman’s mucus pattern appears and changes in a way that is not typical, or "textbook perfect".

Add onto the fact that each NFP method has its own way of describing and categorizing types of mucus, and it can be even more overwhelming for a woman who is already confused.

The goal of this post is to hopefully inform women the universality of cervical mucus, and how to discover who her particular pattern to make charting easier.

Note that I will be describing cervical mucus as taught by SymptoPro.

What does cervical mucus look like?

Mucus will not always be so clear cut for every woman. Perhaps she is confused by mucus that *looks* more fertile, but *feels* less fertile when touched, as an example. We must remember one thing: cervical mucus changes from less fertile to more fertile on a spectrum, not from one clearly defined stage one stage to another. This is why some women find that they

So how can you know when this point of change occurs? By focusing on the specific traits of the mucus, rather than trying to push a specific definition onto it right away.

The more slippery, wet, transparent, and/or stretchy the mucus is, the more supportive of sperm survival and transport it will be in the woman’s body.  Some people describe this mucus as more fertile.  In SymptoPro, we call any mucus with even just one of these traits as eggwhite.  Even if the mucus only has ONE of the following traits -- slipperiness/wetness, transparency/semi-transparency, or stretches an inch or more -- it is considered eggwhite. 

Cervical mucus with drier and less stretchy qualities, and the more opaque colored it is, the less supportive of sperm it will be.  Some people call this less fertile, because it is not as conductive of sperm survival and transportation (though it is still able to aid sperm mobility at least a little).  This kind of mucus is simply called sticky.  Sticky mucus is defined as any mucus that does not have any eggwhite mucus traits.  It can also be described as creamy or lotion-like, or even gummy, rubbery, or tacky.  It is solid colored (white or yellowish) and only stretches to less than an inch.

And of course, when no cervical mucus is present at all, sperm will not survive for more than a few hours in the acidic vaginal environment.  On "dry" days, you may experience vaginal moisture, which is the natural moisture created by the vagina, and does not have the same body or dexterity of mucus.  If it dries up and disappears into the toilet paper when rubbed, or if it dries off quickly when you wave your finger, then it is likely vaginal moisture.  You may also see dampness because of urine or perspiration soaked into the toilet paper; again, it has no body like that of mucus.

So what about tricky mucus patterns?

As you can tell, cervical mucus can come in different forms. Each woman will have her own pattern of mucus that is more fertile or less fertile; in other words, her own "variety" of eggwhite and sticky mucus.  For some women, they may even produce a less fertile kind of mucus during their infertile time instead of being dry, and it is important to know what their infertile pattern is in connection with mucus production (this is known as her Basic Infertile Pattern, or BIP). In some cases, a woman will have a BIP of mucus with eggwhite quality!

To know your own particular mucus pattern, you must chart your cycles for 4-6 cycles to understand not only the type of mucus you produce, but also the mucus production's relation to the opening and closing of your fertile window.  With the help of an instructor and much practice, any woman can come around to understand her own particular mucus.

Do you produce a lot of mucus? Do you begin to produce mucus on or before a safe period before ovulation?  If you produce constant mucus, how can you tell what your Basic Infertile Pattern is?  Having an instructor look over these charts will help you know what is and isn't normal for you.

When Cervical Mucus is weird

Some women have the 'blessing' of having particularly frustrating mucus patterns.  If you feel this is the case, then you should focus on two things:

1. Charting as much detail as you can about your cervical mucus observations, and
2. Finding any changes in cervical mucus from less fertile to more fertile in connection to your waking temperature

Recall my earlier comment of cervical mucus differentiating on a spectrum, not in specific categories. The more detail you chart, the better able you are to know when your BIP of mucus makes a point of change to more fertile (even if you produce day after day of eggwhite).  Remember: no matter your mucus pattern, or any pattern with your fertile signs, you can always know when your body is trying to ovulate.  With charting, you can note down these signs (however subtle they are) and pinpoint when this change from infertile to fertile occurs.

Detailing Your Mucus Traits

When you observe your mucus through out the day, take note of the following:

• What were the most fertile mucus traits you saw that day?  Remember that eggwhite mucus traits are considered most fertile, but try not to get too wound up in figuring out the type of mucus you saw.  Focus only on the traits you observed.  You can figure out the overall type later; it's easier to first focus on only the traits you see.  And whatever most fertile traits you saw, that is what you chart.
• How many times that day did your most fertile mucus occur? Do not count all the times you saw any mucus that day, only occurrences in which eggwhite traits occurred (and if you had no eggwhite traits, the number of times you has sticky mucus traits).  If you had semi-transparent mucus that appeared only twice that day, and that was the most fertile sign you saw all day, then you write down that you had semi-transparent eggwhite two times.
• As you touch and feel your mucus, did it dry up quickly, or was it very wet?  Some women note that their "fertile mucus" is wetter than mucus that is associated with an infertile time. Even if they are both sticky or both eggwhite, mucus occurring around ovulation leaves behind more moisture. You can look out for this pattern.
• Check your undies. While not a totally reliable sign by itself, this little tip can be a handy cross check. More fertile mucus often leaves behind a damp circle in your underwear crotch, while less fertile mucus leaves drier and sticker rectangular lines. You shouldn't chart by underwear alone, but it can be handy when assessing your mucus that day.
• Look out for other fertile signs. Things like midcycle spotting, food cravings, breast tenderness, and more can occur at specific times during your cycle in relation to ovulation or post-ovulation. Again, like with the underwear trick, they are not consistent enough to be charted on their own. Yet by cross checking them when any mucus patterns you catch, you can have an extra boost of confidence in identifying mucus changes.

Keep it Simple: Cross Check!

Perhaps you do all that I recommend here, and follow your instructor's guidance to a "T". However, you may still be confused by your patterns, or you simply don't have the confidence to trust what you see by mucus alone.

Luckily, a woman can give more than just one sign of fertility! Other objective signs include temperature pattern, vaginal sensations, and changes in the cervix's position, feeling, and shape. By checking these signs along with your mucus pattern, you can get that extra "boost" you need to know the beginning and end of your fertile window.

Any woman can depend on her body to give her signs of fertility and infertility.

With the right support and education, a couple can know that the woman's menstrual cycle can be "deciphered". Ovulation is no longer some random event we can not anticipate: science has given us a way to track this event through cervical mucus and other signs.

Good luck! And if you ever need consultation on a chart, you know where to find me. ;)

Trying to Whatever: What It Is And How You Can Practice It

In the NFP community, there are some interesting acronyms to describe a couple's family planning intention.  They include: TTA, TTC, and TTW.

When a couple is TTA (trying to avoid), they will time intercourse during their infertile time so that they will not get pregnant; for those who are TTC (trying to conceive), they time intercourse well within their most fertile days in order to have another baby. For these two intentions, it’s pretty cut and dry of when and how to time intercourse.  You either have sex during your fertile time....or you don't!

So what about those who are trying to whatever (TTW)?

For those who are neither for nor against another pregnancy, and wish to emulate that spirit, “letting them come as they may” is harder to practice at first.  When a couple has a good understanding of their fertility signs, how can they truly have intercourse whenever they want, without fully knowing if they will get pregnant?

There are different ways to accomplish a true TTW attitude, and what I share here is from my own experience and advice from others.  Don’t feel like what I write here is the end all be all of TTW practice!  Follow your gut and compare it to what you learn here and elsewhere in order to make your decision.

1. Don’t chart at all.  If you don’t have serious health-related reasons to chart, then why bother?  Don’t log into your charting app;  file away your paper charts; don’t check your cervical mucus and cervix position when you go to the bathroom; pack up your thermometer and/or ovulation predictor kit; in essence, ignore your body!  It may take getting used to if you have been charting diligently for so long, and it is not easy trying to push aside all you have learned about observing fertility.  But once you stop charting altogether, it will come to you more easily. And for those who always found charting to be a bother: this is probably the easiest thing you can do!
2. Chart, but bend the rules.  Perhaps you have a health-related reason to chart (such as being high risk for miscarriage), or you simply want to accurately predict the due date in case you do get pregnant.  If that is the case, you can still remain TTW while observing your fertile signs.  This can be done by not strictly following rules to TTA or TTC. You can achieve this by: having intercourse on days during your "less fertile" mucus days; not waiting until a few days after your last occurrence of fertile mucus to continue with intercourse; etc.  Although chances of a pregnancy occurring your your less fertile days is not big, they certainly are not small either!
3. Practice Psuedo-Charting.  If you want to do away with strict charting but still have an idea of when you ovulated (in order to predict a more accurate due date in case you get pregnant), then you can chart lazily!  Perhaps this means only charting one fertile sign instead of many (if you practice STM or Marquette), not detailing the specific traits of your cervical mucus if you do Creighton or Billings, or jotting down general notes on your fertile signs onto a notepad instead of having a clear chart telling you what’s what.  In essence, make your charting as simple and basic as possible, to where you have a vague idea of when you are fertile, but nothing is certain.
4. Space pregnancies with breastfeeding ONLY.  Ecological breastfeeding, if followed properly, can be a great way to space pregnancies without having to chart.  Some women who breastfeed will pay attention to any signs of returning fertility so that they can chart, await ovulation, and avoid intercourse when necessary.  However, other women may not pay attention to any fertile signs at all and thus do not abstain, making them TTW.  They ecologically breastfeed and that’s that! Some pregnancies are spaced by a few years, others a little less than a year. It varies in length, but it gives the couple the option of spacing children without having to chart and thus not knowing when they are or are not fertile.

Additional Tip: Just because you go TTW one cycle, doesn't mean you are obligated to stay that way another. If you don't get pregnant and find that you wish to go TTC or TTA, then by all means: switch intentions! The beauty of NFP is that you can always change your mind (though if you change to TTA after becoming pregnant during TTW/TTC, it's a bit late for that).

TTW is certainly a unique intention that has the possibility of charting, sort of charting, or not charting at all. It gives couples a sense of surprise as to whether or not they will have another child every cycle that comes, and for others it's simply a relief from charting when they don't feel the need to be that serious about it anyway.

If you and your spouse decide that being strictly TTA or TTC is not your thing, give TTW a try.  Hopefully any one of these pointers can help you decide how to accomplish that!

Fertility Monitors: Whether You Chart or Not

Natural Family Planning got it’s start with paper charts and pens. You note your body's signs for fertility or infertility during the day, and then write down what you saw in the evening. Done!

But as technology progresses and modern women become more interested in natural methods, it is unsurprising that the family planning market start investing in monitors and tests that answers the “Am I fertile today?” question for you. 

They can track ovulation hormones, the ferning of saliva, your temperature while you sleep: perhaps a mix of two or more.  Even for those who are reliable charters, they may feel more secure either double checking with this new innovation, or replace it all together. (Hey, no shame in being lazy ;) ).

Personally, I find that learning natural family planning the old fashioned way is best: you learn to get comfortable with your body, and at the end of the day, you can always return to your own observations should technology fail. It sets the foundation needed to know whether or not you need a fertility monitor; and if you do, said foundation gives you an educated idea of what you should be looking for.

Still, for those who seek an alternative to traditional charting, or want something to back up what they see, I wanted to make a list of what was available.  If you are going to choose this route, it helps to be educated on your choices! 

Hormonal

Works by tracking the hormones that induce ovulation, or the ones after the fact, by testing your urine.  They tell you objectively whether ovulation is coming up or if it has already passed. Although they are a guaranteed cost as you have to replenish your supply, they can be worth it for those who want to minimize interpretation errors as little as possible.

• Clear Blue Easy fertility monitors and tests

**There are different kinds of hormonal monitors on the market that track the hormones proceeding ovulation (especially LH); this is why I linked to the general website rather than list out the different options.  The most accurate brand out there is Clear Blue Easy, but you can also find LH strips and other brands at your local drug store or super market.  Amazon also has a lot to offer, and you can buy cheaper in bulk.**

• MFB Fertility Progesterone test sticks

• Progesterone blood draws

**This is something you will have to find a doctor/clinic to handle for you, rather than go out and buy. Aside from infertility treatments, this will become obsolete anyway once MFB Fertility’s test sticks become more mainstream. Still, it is an option and one I will list.**

Temperature

Monitors that track basal body temperature (your body's temperature when at rest) often take your temperature for you as you sleep, some even telling you when a shift from low temps to high have occurred (indicating that ovulation has occurred).  Some send the temperature directly to an app on your tablet or phone so that you do not have to note them down for yourself. Be sure to note the tech's features before buying to find a fit for your lifestyle.

• TempDrop

• Lady Temp Fertility Monitor

• YONO Labs Earbud Thermometer

• iBasal Thermometer

Saliva Ferning

This is less objective, and not a reliable fertile sign by itself. The theory is that your saliva gains fern-like patterns around ovulation, though this has not been consistent among all women. Still, if you show a clear pattern, it can be a useful tool to crosscheck your charting with. Ease of mind is the best state of mind!

• Fertile Focus

• Fertility Tracker

Multiple Symptoms

The following monitors combine one or more fertile signs for tracking your cycle, and come with the use of apps for tablet/phones.  This is more handy for those couples or women who want an "all-in-one" device for maximum coverage, so to speak.

• Ava Fertility Monitor
• OvaCue

"Is NFP hard to use?" Part 1

While advocating for the use of fertility awareness -- whether as a family planning method through Natural Family Planning or simply to use as a first step into taking charge of one’s health -- I have been both politely questioned and harshly critiqued on my assertions that NFP is not incredibly hard.

And in a way, I still believe this.  You don’t need a medical degree (or heck, even a high school diploma!) to learn about the menstrual cycle and human fertility, and how to apply this knowledge in charting.  Tribal peoples, who are illiterate and have concepts of science and the world vastly different from us, have been taught to use variations of NFP quite successfully.  If they can internalize it, then just about anyone can if they wish to make the effort.

Besides, you hear it ALL the time from NFP advocates that NFP is easy to use, right?  Go to any fertility awareness website, and you are bombarded with images of energized, healthy women at peace with the world.  More often than not, they are at the beach, or in the middle of a green field, at one with themselves and Sister Nature.

Still, that doesn’t mean NFP is a breeze in the park as a whole or for everyone.  And it makes sense: it’s not just a family planning method, it’s a mode of awareness and a lifestyle choice.  It still requires much commitment and time to learn your method efficiently, and in some situations or circumstances, NFP can be very demanding.  Just as there are the pros, there are the cons, some much more troublesome than others, depending on the person and their circumstances.

I hope to go over these points that discuss the “not so easy” side of NFP, so that people wanting to learn more about NFP (especially for religious reasons) can get an honest picture before they find these things out the hard way.  Then, they can be better prepared and know how to prevent or handle these hardships.

First, a disclaimer: I will be going over NFP only, not the Fertility Awareness Method (FAM), which allows the use of barrier methods or alternative sex acts during the fertile time.  Not that FAM has no downsides whatsoever because of that, but because much of the “hard stuff” involving NFP are hard because of the abstinence-only rule for pregnancy avoidance.

“How can NFP be hard?”

NFP can be hard for a variety of reasons, based on the following:

• Initially learning the method

Let’s be honest: if you grew up in your 20-30+ years of life and never once learned an ounce about what fertility awareness teaches, NFP will take some commitment to understand.

Some people jump into the classes eagerly, having a natural desire to learn and understand their bodies.  However, there might be others who learn begrudgingly because it is required for Marriage Preparation, or because a partner pestered them to try it out.  This stubbornness itself may block out information they would otherwise retain, or cause unneeded strife for their spouse who wishes to learn.

They also have to take time out of their day to spend a few hours at a class, and then take two more classes over the course of a month; or maybe they go to a seminar over the weekend that they may need to travel for (classes vary among NFP organizations).  Then, they have to spend many months afterwards getting used to their method and turning in charts to their instructors. 

And the payment?  Some classes are quite affordable, or allow access to financial aid; others may be quite expensive and additional payment needed for future follow ups.  It all depends on the method you go for and the instructor you go to.  If money is constantly brought up, it could cause more stress than needed.

The last problem may be having a poor instructor.  Perhaps they are condescending, or do nothing to help their clients better understand their method.  Perhaps they are simply overbearing, and clients feel like a burden for asking them for help.  This is a horrible relationship to have with an instructor when you are first learning, as it bars you from growing into your method.

• Implementing NFP into one’s lifestyle

Observing your fertile signs, at the most, should only take a few minutes out of your day.  Charting them down at the end of a day takes only seconds.  And with new apps for charting on the market, charting is now more visually appealing, as well as making traveling with charts much easier to handle.

However, what if someone is new to a method and is confused on what to do?  What if they simply can NOT get the hang of the subtle differences in cervical mucus in their own particular pattern? On top of that, some women simply forget to chart, or to check for their fertile signs.

And this goes beyond mere charting.  NFP involves the willingness to abstain during the fertile time, and to have both husband and wife openly communicate about their family planning intentions, sexuality, and all that entails.  Couples who have deep rooted issues that prevent this from working smoothly will either see this lifestyle change as an opportunity to amend the marriage strife, or as a reality bomb blowing up in their face.

• Practicing NFP faithfully/Charting consistently

This somewhat ties into the lifestyle change.  It truly only takes a few minutes each day to chart, and can be done as a part of one’s evening or bedtime routine; still, for some, it simply doesn’t click. 

I myself do not fully understand it as well, as after getting over the initial hurdles and learning some “short cuts”, charting became second nature to me.  However, I have noticed a trend: those who are very serious about avoiding pregnancy tend to be vigilant charters.  Those who don’t see pregnancy as being a big deal, on the other hand, may slack in their charting as they don’t feel as much pressure to chart.  I have gone through both mindsets myself!

A third group, however, who are serious about avoiding pregnancy but still struggle with charting everyday, are people who are simply stressed out.  This is especially true if only the woman has the sole responsibility of charting and deciphering her fertile signs.  The husband is not involved at all, and all the pressure to use the method correctly is on the wife.

When this happens, the man becomes bitter with his wife for telling him “no” on fertile days, and the woman becomes bitter to her husband for having to do all the work.  When there is this strife, charting is much more of a mountain climb than a stroll in the park!

• Accepting NFP as a Catholic

As a Catholic NFP instructor, I sometimes get called a hypocrite for defending the procreative aspect of sex, while teaching people how to time intercourse for the infertile time to avoid pregnancy.  Some people, going through intense and even life-threatening health crisis, outright attack Church teaching on sexuality and demand that changes be made for couples who experience such struggles.

This is one that can not be simply fixed with a few charting tricks/short cuts, or lead back to sanity by a competent instructor.  This is something that requires a willingness to learn, to pray, and to open communications with between the spouses, God, and Church documents on the Catholic faith. 

That is something not every person is open too, or at the very least, not open to learning and understanding more without kicking and screaming.  It is a matter of the heart that takes time to accept. 

And if the heart isn’t into it, it will be a struggle to truly accept and use NFP.

• Using NFP when dealing with a serious reason to avoid pregnancy

This one is the hardest to face, in my opinion.  In cases such as these, pregnancy is a very real fear, and it shouldn’t have to be.  Yet, the couple finds themselves facing extreme poverty, or a medically dangerous pregnancy, if they should conceive a child.

Now, in extreme cases such as this, you can be assured NFP will work, given that strict guidelines are followed.  However, that doesn’t stop the nagging fear and anxiety that creeps into the mind of those who are avoiding for very serious reasons.  This is especially true if conflicting schedules, the care of older children, postpartum irregularity, and over-conservative observance of charting rules lead to more abstinence than is necessary.

Add on pressuring doctors to get sterilization, the mounting sexual and marital frustration, or misguided friends urging you to drop NFP, and you get yourself a couple on edge.

• Pressure from oneself, their partner, or others to fear NFP as unreliable

Modern society is absolutely horrible when it comes to fully understanding fertility awareness based methods. So-called “women’s health” organizations and magazines snub their articles at NFP/FAM, claiming that it’s not reliable and especially not for women with irregular cycles.  They then end their garbage fest with, “And here’s how you can use the Pill/IUD/condom”, with a Planned Parenthood certified OB/GYN to sign it all off as “accurate”.

However, it’s easy enough to correct these articles in the comments section, and rely on more accurate info from fertility awareness organizations.  But it’s another thing when you hear this drivel from your own family and friends -- especially your own spouse!

After starting to use NFP, they stare at you from afar, just waiting for you to get pregnant and then ask you why you couldn’t have just used a condom.  No matter how many times you try to explain to them what you learned in class about cervical mucus and basal body temperature and ovulation and sperm production, all they keep repeating is, “But the Rhythm Method doesn’t work!”

And such rejections are even harder to deal with when coming from your own significant other.  Some are more stubborn than others, and do not care how many scientifically-backed studies on NFP you show them: it’s nothing but “hippie bullshit”, or “the inaccurate Rhythm Method”.  They think it will mean months of abstinence and then getting pregnant anyway once you DO have sex.

This gets worse if they refuse to learn the method with you, and want no part in charting.  They only make things more difficult yet want to blame it solely on the method or even their spouse.

With these hardships in mind, how can these problems be lessened or even done away with?

NFP will always present a challenge at some point in one’s life, and they can not be avoided indefinitely.  This is the reality of any family planning method. However, there are still ways a couple can lessen these issues and avoid unnecessary stress, or at the very least deal with them with a level head should they occur.

Next week, I will share information on how to accomplish this.  In the meantime, do you have any insights to the problems presented here?  Feel free to let me know!

When Charting Becomes a Drag: Making NFP Easier to Chart

Charting requires a learning curve to any couple learning to use NFP, no matter the method.  Every day you must not only observe your fertile signs everyday, but also remember to note down what you saw.  However, many find that over time, charting is such a normal and natural part of their lives, they do it without much fuss.  It takes only minutes a day to observe your fertile signs, and then mere seconds to note them down on your chart.

Still, charting every single day can be a bit draining.  It can be especially difficult if only one spouse is charting (whether temporarily or permanently) and feels burdened by the constant work.  Perhaps the woman travels a lot and wants to know an easier way to note her observations as she constantly moves about.  Maybe you have kids at home and find it hard to recall when you should chart.  And lets be honest...some people like me are just lazy. ;)

Luckily there are quite a few "short cuts" and tricks any NFP couple can utilize that can help lessen the load that comes with charting.  (Note that I am going over short cuts and tips for charting with the Sympto-Thermal Method; for short cuts/tips with other NFP methods, speak with a certified instructor who teaches it).

Remembering to Chart

Whether you are forgetful, busy, or just straight up lazy, sometimes we forget to chart our observations for the day.  It's important to note down what you observed as soon as possible, as you may forget if you wait until the next day.  Luckily, there are ways to help us sit down and get it done.

Consider setting an alarm on your phone.  Perhaps at 8pm everyday, your phone will go off, and it can be a reminder to stop what you are doing and jot down your notes onto your chart.  Of course you can set the alarm for whatever time best fits into your schedule, so long as you do it at the same time each day to help facilitate the habit.  If you often forgo bathroom breaks and don't check your mucus observations much as a result, you can use an alarm as well.  Set up scheduled alarms to make yourself use the restroom periodically throughout the day, and utilize those times to check up on your cervical mucus!

Teamwork tends to lighten the work load.  If you are the only person who charts: bring in the spouse!  You may have to have him read your NFP book on how the method works, or simply go over the charting symbols with him: but whatever the case, having the man participate can make charting easier to bear with.  If need be, have him meet your instructor to ask any questions he has, or to guide him in how to use the method with you.

Temperature-taking has its short cuts too.  The husband can hand over the thermometer after the alarm goes off in the morning, sparing you from fumbling around and moving too much.  After the temp taking is done, he may also take out the thermometer and put it back.  ( This teamwork ties in with the last point ;) ) If you tried all the tips you can but can not get a reliable temperature because of getting up in the night to care for young children, I would recommend looking into Temp Drop.  It is a neat little device that is placed under your upper arm at night, and it takes your temperature for you: without the need for waking up or using an alarm!  It is pricey but well worth it if you just hate using your regular thermometer.

Choose a charting method that suits you.  Some people love their paper charts, others swear by their charting apps: it simply depends on the person.  If you decide paper charts are easier to use, be sure to have it somewhere you will remember to write on it.  Some have it on the bathroom mirror, others on their bedroom dresser or on the wall next to the bed.  Apps themselves are handy for those who prefer electronics, as they are visually appealing and are not at the mercy of your handwriting mistakes.  And if the app is on your phone, it will be easy to remember to chart when you see the icon on your phone or computer screen.

Trouble with interpreting your chart?  Ask for help.  Some people feel overwhelmed with charting if their cycles are confusing, or they are still trying to get used to the rules of NFP.  It's not charting down their observations that are the problem, but knowing what to make of what they see! If this is the case, then reach out for all the support and tips you can.  Do not be afraid to call or email your instructor your chart and asking for her input.  If you are part of a social media group or forum for NFP users, you can also post your chart there and receive help from fellow NFP users or instructors.  If your cervical mucus or other signs of fertility are somewhat confusing you, then consider going over the traits in your NFP books, and repeat the previous steps with your NFP instructor and community.

Charting Short-Cuts

Did you know that you don't have to chart every single day in order to use it reliably?  While you MUST chart every single day when first learning how to chart, after a number of months you may decide it's time to cut it back a bit. You understand your usual pattern and no longer need to note down excess information.

The following short cuts for safe charting can offer a lessen on the load.

You do not have to take your waking temperature during menstruation, nor after you have had a confirmed temperature rise.  Unless you tend to have very early ovulation, there is no need to take your temperature while you are bleeding. 

Also, once you have confirmed ovulation has occurred, through a sustained temperature rise, you also do not need to continue temping in the morning.  Whatever temperature rule you use for your chart, after it has been fulfilled, you are free to put the thermometer in the drawer until the next cycle calls for it again.

Another tip for temperature taking is to wait until day 6 or further to start temping.  Depending on how early or late your temperature shifts from low to high, you can put off taking your waking temperature until day 6 or later in your cycle.  Because the temperature rule that confirms ovulation requires 6 low temperatures proceeding three high ones, you can put off temping until the day you've had your earliest 6th last low temperature. 

Look back at your last 12 cycles.  Write down the day when the earliest 6th last low temperature occurred for each cycle.  Which ever cycle had the earliest occurrence of a 6 last low, that would be the day when you would start temping each cycle.  So if you had 12 cycles that showed a range of 6 last lows from day 11 to day 14, you would start temping the morning of day 11 of your cycle.

If you think it is not safe enough to wait to temp until the earliest day a 6th last low occurred, you can simply put off temping until day 6 or 7 of your cycle.

After Peak Day is established with cervical mucus, and it coincides with a temperature shift, you know longer need to observe or chart your mucus sign.  A peak day means your last occurrence of your most fertile mucus sign.  After Peak Day is confirmed, and it coincides with a sustained temperature shift of lows to highs, it means you ovulated.  And not only that: it means you will not ovulate again for the rest of your cycle!  All day every day until your period begins again, you are completely infertile.  There is no need to chart your mucus until you start your next cycle.

The same can be done for your vaginal sensation and cervical observations.  After you have confirmation that you have ovulated and the egg is dead and gone, you no longer have to keep charting anything (though I would recommend you note down if you had intercourse).

If you don't have to chart this or that: then don't!  Let's say you chart all four signs -- waking temperature, cervical mucus, vaginal sensation, AND cervical position.  Perhaps you note down the specific traits of your mucus as well.  And maybe every single exercise you do during the week.  And also when you ate that one cupcake at a birthday party!

You get my point.  Unless you need to chart down details of ALL your fertile signs to accurately establish your fertile window, or require to note down lifestyle habits for your health, you can cut back on the extras. 

Perhaps, after going over it with your instructor, you find that you can use NFP accurately enough with just waking temperature and mucus observations; the other signs can just be used as back up.  Instead of noting down the exact color and stretch of your mucus, or how many times a day you see it, you just note down what kind of mucus it was and leave it at that.  If your exercise or diet routines don't really affect your fertility at all: then why chart down the who what when where and why of it all?

If you are only charting for sake of avoiding a pregnancy, then don't overbear yourself if you don't have to.  You can keep things accurate by charting simply, granted that you double check it with your instructor first.

There you have it

Charting made more simple, and yet still accurate enough to use for family planning.  Do you have any tips or suggestions yourself?  Then let me know. :)